Intimate time

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Intimate time

Postby kidden on Sun Aug 03, 2008 5:19 pm

ok - not sure about age restrictions on this board (im new) but want to vent
my s/o is a gamer (WoW) and for quite a few months our ummmmm intimate time together has ceased to exist. Now a girl has needs right?? so what to do?? Partner stays up gaming 7 nights a week - till way after i fall into bed (usually exhausted from doing everything round the house, working 6 days a week and full time uni- not to mention the 3 kids) If he doesnt play at night (approx 1 or 2 nights a month) he falls asleep on the couch in front of the tv really early. For example on Saturday night he didnt play cause i threw a tantrum, so he gets off the computer about 4 in the afternoon, at 5 he says im buggered im going for a quick nap before dinner, he falls asleep and sleeps until 11.30pm, when everyones in bed, gets up and games all night.
So back to the original question - the sex life is non existent, which he blames ME for despite the fact that im constantly nagging, bitching and whingeing for him to come to bed at the same time as me, has anyone else experienced this?? If so how did you handle it?? All suggestions comments and sympathy welcome
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Re: Intimate time

Postby newlywedwidow on Sun Aug 10, 2008 10:45 pm

I am in the same position. Mine is a little different though. When we first got married I was newly on the pill and did not know it would affect my sex drive. He had me convinced that I did not find him attractive anymore and that I was a bad wife. To this day he denies it but I believed him. I said something to my sister right before my next pap and she said it was the pill and to have them switch it. When they did we went at it like rabbits. Then the game came along and it has slowed to an almost halt since, but again it is my fault because when I am frustrated with him I don't want it. Well, the only thing I could tell him is that if he wants me to not be frustrated, and therefore get the sex back, cut back on the playing. He did and it still hasn't come back. Don't know what to say but I feel your pain. Question for you...when you do get intimate, is it like he has forgotten everything? Almost like it is his first time again and he has no clue what he is doing? Just curious.

I am worth it and so are you! Remember...It's not how many breaths you take. It's how many moments take your breath away!
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Re: Intimate time

Postby Afterglow on Wed Nov 26, 2008 4:04 pm

Jump right into my nightmare...the water is warm. Intimacy what is that? I am allowed a glimpse of it once maybe twice a month if i beg plead and scream. He says he just has a really low drive but my God really? The guys I dated before I was married never said no. I have even had people tell me well your married it's normal...but it doesn't seem normal. My husband averages 5 hours of sleep a night. He comes to bed after me and I am gone before he wakes up. He spends all of his free time gaming. I feel like that movie Fried Green Tomatoes where she spends all this time making a nice dinner and he grabs the plate and heads for the couch to watch the game ...only mine heads to the cave to play WOW not to be heard of again till the next day at feeding time. I wish I had an answer on how to rekindle the spark. I have seriously contimplated sabotaging his pc so it doesn't work, but he would just buy another. Hang in there girl if there's no sex let there at least be hope! :grouphug
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Re: Intimate time

Postby Psykiblue on Wed Nov 26, 2008 8:19 pm

First of all, off topic- I love Fried Green Tomatoes.

2nd, I haven't had the issue of the intimacy waning because we were long distance, so I guess mine was emotional distance. Being married, doesn't mean that sex goes out the window.

Have you tried talking to your husband? Writing a letter if he won't listen? Maybe talk to a therapist? They might be able to give you helpful advice on how to get your husband to listen, I wish you the best of luck in it all.
I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent.



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Re: Intimate time

Postby wowhusband on Mon Jun 20, 2011 2:17 pm

I will tell you right now, the reason there is really nobody on this thread becaue you woman are all alone.

Almost every other dude plays wow. I am a wow player that joined this to complain about wow wives but i learned

I play so much because i love sex and sick of waiting her out. So i do things i want to do and fill all my time with drums and wow. I have done all the things that make me a wow husband, but i would trade it all for sex
in a heartbeat.

That thing i read about the pill makes all the sence in the world - she started the pill after we had a baby scare 5-7 years ago she got on this pill and well......i started playing wow. I could not understand how she tells me everyday how much she loves me but wont have sex with me.

Well maybe not in the way this site was intended - but it may have saved another relationship
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Re: Intimate time

Postby Siead on Sun Nov 27, 2011 10:12 am

@ wowhusband. i dont know if that is true for all men. my gamer husband could have sex on demand, any time and any way he wants it and he is well aware of this fact. but i am lucky if we have any fun once or twice a year. some men just have low sex drives. or some just prefer the game.
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